Sunday 3 March 2013

I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant; Some Unedited Discourse For Sunday Night Consumption

I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant is possibly the best thing to happen to reality television since Fear Factor. It has all the medical sass of Embarrassing Bodies, yet more drama than Big Brother. How this program slipped under my procrastinating radar for so long is beyond me.
 
If you are unfortunate enough not to have made contact with this Jesus of reality television, prepare to have any lucid thought totally blown.  Every episode reenacts the "real life" story of women who either think they have intense menstrual cramps or a mother fucker of a bowel movement. Like the title suggests, these women suddenly give birth, the catch... they don't even know they were pregnant. As I write this I feel as though I make it sound repetitive and boring, and for the most part it is. But there is something almost compelling in which the miracle of life commence in a toilet bowl or (my personal favourite) "sweat pants".
 
 
I honestly don't know what I find so intriguing about this show. Perhaps it is just the face the actors pull when someone tells them they are in labour, or crowning. They often look more surprised than I did when I saw the images of Tony Abbott in speedos. Perhaps it is just the general concept that 99% of these women think that labour pain is just them taking a massive shit. To be honest, I don't really want to know why I am attracted to this show. The more I think about it, the more I realize the inappropriate nature of my attachment. Do me a favour and get half as addicted as I am.
 
 
WARNING: Viewers may contract the quite real fear that they will give birth at any given time.

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