Define Gay

Kookaburras, the world's first homosexual bird species or just jovial?

 Every Australian has heard the adorable song which tells a brief narrative of a Kookaburra sitting in an old gum tree, manically laughing because he or she is either an extremely jovial bird or a raging homosexual. In today’s contemporary society either of these should be accepted. Educational boards are attempting to alter the lyrics of this classic Australian song morphing the Kookabura’s life from gay to fun in a bid to prevent laughter and misunderstanding from students.

I find the whole situation rather amusing. Correct me if I’m wrong but we attend school to be educated. This song should beckon discussions with children about the various meanings of the word gay. Clearly education in this area is lacking, simple adolescents frequently throw round the word gay as either an insult or a substitute word for what the French refer to as ‘merde’. Seriously, get educated and use the word in the correct context. 

“It was so gay how the bus was late. I had to sit next to the boy with the gay hair cut while I sat and did my gay Maths homework because if I didn’t gay Mr. Ferguson would give me a detention because he is gay.”Honestly there is only one noun in the sentence that could actually be attracted to other males, I will give you a hint. It is not the boy's mullet.

Next time you or the half wit in school uniform near you deems something gay, consider whether it actually literally posses gay qualities.  Was Maths actually literally gay? Because to be frank I think the answer will mostly be no; unless you’re a nerd enjoying learning about surds. In which case contact me, I need a maths tutor, we can have a gay time with numbers.